This post was composed on my apartment floor…
Not because I ate too much Mexican food and had to lie down (it’s not Tuesday), but because all my furniture is in another town. Another state. Another time zone.
I’m moving on from a time and place that taught me a lot. Largely, what it means to be a coach.
I spent 4 years training in the same gym – that’s longer than the total career lifespan for many a personal trainer. I certainly had my share of good and not-so-good times, but carried with me a vision I was lucky to see come to fruition.
But it almost never happened.
As just about any trainer will tell you, we’re in this business to help people.
Here’s the problem – few actually do, myself included.
Case in point:
A month or so into the job, I had my first appointment with Gary – a gentleman in his late 50’s interested in losing a bit of weight and generally moving and feeling better.
After a quick workout, I spent nearly 45 minutes fielding Gary’s questions about stretching, cardio, gluten, wine, and sleep.
I was feeling pretty good about the whole situation until my boss at the time asked me the question I would soon adopt as a behavioral benchmark – “Did you really help him?”
“Of course I did! I answered all of his questions with sound scientific backing blah blah blah”
“You were very helpful,” he quipped. “But you didn’t actually help him.”
He was right. I was wasting time. Lecturing on about exercise science is a common pitfall among new trainers… Also among people who want to look smart on the internet.
A coach should not mistake himself for a professor.
The difference between being helpful and actually helping someone is vast.
Being helpful is easy – any local can give directions to a lost tourist. The problem is Google will always be more helpful than you.
Genuinely helping someone is messy. It can take a long time to know if you’re even in the ballpark.
Yes, there are many books on coaching which may be helpful.
There are also many books on diet and exercise. To this day, nobody has gotten jacked by reading.
I may have learned my lesson the hard way, but at least I learned it.
Do your job. If it’s to help people (and whose job isn’t?) – do it.
If you’re working with a coach, help him help you – it can be a tough gig to figure out.
PS – After a period of some months, I was able to help Gary lose weight, feel younger, and pop out of bed in the morning.
He sent this message nearly 2 years after our last session together.
